Change to the Disclaimer

Please note that the disclaimer for my blog has been changed:

DISCLAIMER: THIS BLOG REFLECTS MY VIEWS ONLY, AND DOES NOT REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE U.S. GOVERNMENT OR PEACE CORPS. THIS BLOG IS PASSWORD-PROTECTED FOR A REASON. SOME OF THE INFORMATION MAY BE CONTROVERSIAL AND POTENTIALLY OFFENSIVE TO THE SUBJECTS. DO NOT COPY, REPRODUCE, OR PUBLISH ANY OF THE POSTS OR PARTS OF THE POSTS IN ANY PRINT (NEWSPAPERS, MAGAZINES, BOOKS, ETC.) OR ELECTRONIC MEDIA (ONLINE NEWSPAPERS, SOCIAL NETWORKING SITES, BLOGS, ETC.).

Thank you for staying with me during my South African Peace Corps experience!

LOTTO Scandal Foiled (sort of)

Note: the allegations of corruption presented in this entry are speculation based on events I have observed and information I have received but should not be interpreted as fact.

Where there is government, there is corruption. In South Africa, there is a lot of corruption. I have recently been trying to uncover an embezzlement scandal at my school.

LOTTO is the South African National Lottery and as with the lotteries in the U.S., the funds are supposed to be used to fund various projects and non-profits that serve to improve the lives of South Africans. The National Lottery Distribution Trust Fund (NLDTB) is the group responsible for distributing the LOTTO money to various areas (sports, education, arts and culture, health, etc.). I have a friend who is a South African national whose organization is getting funding from the LOTTO through the Department of Social Services. The CEO of the group is embezzling money to fund his girlfriends, build a new house, and using the company truck as his own personal car.

This entry is not about him but about the corruption that I have been dealing with in the sports section with a woman who, for the sake of anonymity I will call Thandi. Thandi "helps" schools with the LOTTO application and then executes the project and files all of the follow-up paperwork.

The first time I met her (around October 2008), I introduced myself as a Peace Corps volunteer from the U.S. who was working with that primary school for the next two years to help with campus improvements and staff development. I had been told that we had been awarded LOTTO funds for the project and I expressed interest in controlling the funds since I was heading up the sports field project at the school. She backed away wearily and I definitely got a vibe that my presence was not welcome and she wasn't happy with me asking.

In around April of this year, they started construction of the new courts. Shortly after starting, the contractor pulled me aside and told me that he "would be surprised if your school got even half of what Thandi promised them because she spends the money as her own". Given her reaction to me, I was not the least bit surprised to hear of this. To confirm this, I asked the principal where the money had been deposited. Sure enough, it was was deposited into Thandi's PERSONAL checking account.

When filling out the application for funds, Thandi lists herself as the project manager and lists her personal checking account as the location for the money to be deposited. Once the money has been awarded to the school, she-and only she-has access to the money and account. Since she is listed as the project manager on the application, she has no legal responsibility to show any financial transactions or even the LOTTO contract-describing how the funds are to be allocated and reporting requirements-to the school (even though there is supposed to be copies of the contract at the school).

I phoned her to ask for a copy of the LOTTO contract so I could see what all of the financial responsibilities of the recipient are. She said, "It was very unprofessional of you to call me directly, if you wanted to get a copy of the contract then you should have had the Sports Committee call and request it." She continued, "If you wanted to do a sports project at the school you should have brought your own money from America!". So I had the chairman of the committee call her and she denied his request saying, "the only reason that you're asking for it is because David wants it so I'm not going to give it to you".

By the middle of August the contractor had most of the court built with the court paved and the surrounding fence installed and painted but then the work suddenly halted. This was inconvenient timing because at the end of September I was planning on having a volleyball tournament as a way to showcase the new courts. I called the contractor in October to see when they were planning on finishing the work and he said that he was waiting to be paid by Thandi. He has been scammed by her in the past and would not finished until the final payment was made. I asked the principal about it and she said she was waiting on Thandi to get the 2nd round of money (the LOTTO pays in two rounds to ensure the first round of funding was used properly).

Two weeks ago, the Head of Department of the Foundation phase at my school pulled me aside and she informed me that the money had been deposited into Thandi's account. The Sports Committee had demanded that Thandi present her financial records to show that the money is correctly being spent. She must be a smooth talker because somehow she got them to agree to a completion date of the end of December without revealing any financial records. I told her that I didn't think that was sufficient and it is probably an empty promise like all of the other empty promises she has made; she agreed with this assessment. Since she was not authorized to tell me she requested I not tell the principal.

I tried to pry the information out of the principal by asking roundabout questions like: "so, when do you think the courts will be finished?"; "do you know what's holding things up?". I got her to admit that the new money had been deposited but nothing else.

On Saturday we held a meeting with the SGB (the South African equivalent of the PTA in U.S. schools) because I had a lot of topics to discuss: the new kitchen (details to come), a classroom management workshop, a new method of collecting school funds, increasing parental involvement, approval to hold a netball tournament at the school, and leasing the new courts as a way to make money to support the school's sports activities. I requested 30 minutes to talk about these issues since there seems to be a double standard of time and they will wait for hours to meet with you but then only want to meet for a very short time once they meet you and I didn't think they would agree to more initially. They approved the new kitchen, classroom management workshop, and are contemplating the other ones.

The 30 minutes had expired and I still hadn't addressed the leasing of the sports fields. The principal informed me of this but I requested an additional 10 minutes assertively saying that the next piece was very important (to be fair, she was an hour late to the meeting so she should be willing to give me an extra ten minutes) I used the leasing of the courts as a way to segue into inquiring about the LOTTO funding.

Since I had gained the privileged information that the money was deposited into the account I asked "if the money is in the account, and the contractor is waiting to get paid before completing the work, why isn't he getting paid and the courts being completed?". The principal tried to strong-arm me and said "I don't believe you have the knowledge to be talking about such an issue. You've got approval for the kitchen, what more do you want?". Silence. I replied, "I want the school to get all of the things that it deserves and want to make sure that money is going towards the project. It seems to me that there must be something going on especially if Thandi is not willing to release the records, I suggest that if she doesn't then you get a court order forcing her to produce them for you". The principal said, "That's enough, this is a new SGB and you are confusing them since they don't know about the project, goodbye".

I left the meeting and felt that despite my best efforts I had failed at stopping what was wrong even though proving it and ending the corruption seemed so simple to correct. Times like these are what gives me doubt that I am ever going to accomplish anything here. I had decided that I should focus on the new kitchen and let whatever happens with the LOTTO money happen and it was out of my control.

I started running again this morning since my educator commented on Friday that my legs were getting flabby and returned home to see that I had two missed calls from the contractor. I called him back and was pleasantly surprised with the news he had for me. Miraculously, Thandi deposited the required balance into the contractor's account and he is ready to complete the work!

Given the immediacy of the deposit of the money after the confrontation regarding its possible misuse, it makes me wonder how much of this she knew already but was unwilling to admit for whatever reason. However, my job isn't to defame my principal but to improve the school; since she is mostly supporting me in my efforts then I don't really care to speculate further. By getting the money released, the work completed, and a few educators willing to stand against the corruption (to some extent) then I have accomplished what I wanted to accomplish with this part of the project and can move on.

Zuma Rallies S. Africa to Fight AIDS

Despite the controversial dropping of rape charges against Jacob Zuma, only having a 7th grade education, and conservative traditional Zulu values, he may be the best thing that could have happened in the fight against AIDS in South Africa.

The previous administration, headed by Thabo Mbeki, was harshly criticized for their controversial views on HIV/AIDS. Mbeki was in staunch denial that HIV was caused by a virus but that it was caused by malnutrition and allergens. Manto Tshabalala-Msimang, Mbeki's health minister, was criticized for offering up "traditional" remedies such as beetroot soup to replace Anti-retrovirals (ARVs).

During his 2007 trial for the alleged rape of an HIV positive prostitute whom he had unprotected sex with, Zuma claimed that he had taken a cold shower to protect himself against HIV. In sharp contrast to the previous administration and Zuma's past views on AIDS, Zuma gave a speech on the Parliament floor announcing the ANC's new stance on AIDS and the fight against it in South Africa.

In an excerpt from the speech taken from the NY times article "Zuma Rallies S. Africa to Fight AIDS", Zuma said:

"All South Africans must know that they are at risk and must take informed decisions to reduce their vulnerability to infection or, if infected, to slow the advance of the disease. Most importantly, all South Africans need to know their H.I.V. status, and be informed of the treatment options available to them."

Speech Transcript

Other salient points:

"There should be no shame, no discrimination, no recriminations. The stigma surrounding Aids has to be broken."

These are all things that prevent people from receiving the treatment that they need. There is a mysteriously high rate of death due to "the flu". Due to the stigma associated with having or dieing from the disease, people will not reveal their status nor will it be revealed as the cause of death.

"South Africa had very impressive awareness levels about HIV/Aids, well over 95%. We should now seriously work to convert that knowledge into a change of behaviour."

This is huge given that he comes from a culture that frowns upon condom use and circumcision; which are two of the most effective ways to limit the spread of the disease. A common, yet sad, belief of many of the people of that culture is that having sex with a virgin is a cure to the disease.

"Knowledge will help us to confront denialism and the stigma attached to the epidemic,"

Denialism was the mantra of the previous administration.

The following are chilling facts about South Africa:

• 57% of deaths of children under the age of 5 were AIDS related
• The death rate is on course to surpass the birth rate (the death rate jumped 32% from 573000 to 756000 in the past year compared to 1 205 111 births in the same amount of time.
• The life expectancy of a South African male is 9 and 19 years less than Senegal and Nigeria respectively

Supposing that Zuma and the ANC mean what they say and are not just providing lip service, South Africa has the opportunity to continue on its path of growth and leadership of the sub-Saharan countries. The general population also needs to overcome their ignorance that stems from strongly held cultural beliefs and laziness. If they don't take responsibility for the AIDS battle, South Africa has a very bleak future.

Mr. President?

Today I was fortunate enough to meet Aaron Williams, the newly appointed Peace Corps Director. Since he didn't have a lot of time on his visit, two other volunteers working in nearby villages and I went to another volunteer's site for the meeting.

It was convenient for me for two reasons: 1) My site wasn't well prepared to accommodate the visit and 2) I got to see what Haley, the hosting volunteer, had been up to since she has been here.

As can be seen in the post about my school, it is in poor condition and we would have to move learners out of a classroom in order to hold a meeting; this would be not only unfair to the learners but in poor taste as representatives of the U.S. My room is also a disaster since I had a late night visitor that was on top of my wardrobe. I jumped up on my bed and with a broom proceeded to knock everything off the wardrobe using a broom handle and dump the contents of all the bags all over the floor. Also I have many great projects planned but that's it, there is nothing to show for it.

The meeting was instead at Haley's primary school where she teaches reading to special needs children. I was astounded to see the classroom she had set up; partly because there are no additional classrooms at my school but mostly because of how good of a job she did in setting up her classrooms. There were tons of books neatly stacked on recently built bookshelves, teaching aids all over the wall, and it just felt like a place where children would learn; she deserved that opportunity.

Mr. Williams is tall, slender, light skinned, African American man. When he entered one of the classrooms, the learners started going wild and were enthusiastically asking "Aungu Obama naa?". Given the fact that he's tall, slender, light-brown skinned, and from the U.S. government, it's no surprise that they wanted too know, "Is that Obama?". Mr. Williams said he gets that a lot from the children when visiting foreign countries.

He resembled Obama not only physically but also in the respect that he commanded. A former Nicaraguan Peace Corps volunteer himself, he was a very approachable, kind, and progressive leader; which made him a good choice to be appointed as Director of the Peace Corps.

For such a high-profile diplomat he traveled surprisingly light. He didn't have any security officers, only 3 women and 1 man, all of average build and in their mid-twenties; not a very imposing bunch. He rode in the Peace Corps Land Rover with everyone else including some of my fellow South African Peace Corps volunteers. He was also accompanied by my APCD (Associate Peace Corps Country Director) in charge of the education project, and the PTO (Peace Corps Training Officer) for South Africa.

We sat in Haley's classroom in a circle of learners' chairs with all of the tables pushed to one side. Created a less formal and more comfortable environment to hold the meeting. The first part of the meeting was Haley talking about her site and all of the great things that she is doing there. Then, as that discussion was waning, another volunteer, Steve, suggested that the other volunteers talk a little about what they were doing.

It was interesting for me to discover that we all cover very different parts of development and how much work we were all doing together. Haley is a special needs teacher by training, Steve works with ICT, Joanna (the other volunteer) works with HIV/AIDS education and activities, and I focus primarily on infrastructure.
Haley is teaching at both her and Steve's schools; Steve has helped set up computer labs at both Joanna's and Haley's schools (and mine in the near future); Haley and Joanna are going to do an HIV/AIDS workshop at both my and Steve's schools; I'm helping Steve with a bookshelf project; and everyone is learning from my successive failures.

He said "that is music to my ears" when Steve mentioned that from a volunteer's perspective, ICT is severely lacking. There are many discussions going on now about how to better improve the Peace Corps in respect to ICT. One of the biggest and in my opinion most important one is to increase the sharing of information amongst volunteers both within each country and worldwide; all too often volunteers are re-inventing the wheel causing a lot of wasted effort and resources. That is a problem that

I suggested that they add updating the Peace Corps website to the ICT list of things to do. Since the communications director is new and was not responsible for any part of the creation or operation of the existing website she said I could say whatever I wanted about it without fear of reprisal.

Amongst other things, I said that there is very vague and general information for incoming volunteers that doesn't do a good job of describing what Peace Corps actually is. Sometimes prospective volunteers know of someone or knows someone who knows someone who was/is a Peace Corps volunteer and they may send a few e-mails back and forth but that's usually the extent of that relationship. Each post should have their own website with more up-to-date and detailed information about their projects and the post's project goals. Just like universities and colleges there should be not only an incoming/prospective volunteers website but also a current volunteers section.

Other major concerns included an increase in the readjustment allowance-payment accrued to be paid at the completion of service to help us reenter "normal" life-whose rate hasn't changed since 1999, and difficulty in locating money for our projects.

It was a very beneficial meeting-the APCD said "it went swimmingly"-for both Peace Corps Washington and Peace Corps South Africa. I feel very confident that with Mr. Williams in charge, the Peace Corps has a bright future.

A New Concept

Schools in South Africa are very poor. This is not due to a lack of funds but more a misappropriation of funds. Some schools are no-fee schools which means that they don't have to pay the annual R60 (8 USD) for each child attending primary school; secondary school students pay R140/year. This is an extremely small amount of money; even the poorest of the poor should be able to afford this. If a family allocates R3/week to their child's education then that will far exceed the required school fee. Many of them refuse to pay this which I mostly attribute that to a lack of interest in their child's education; most would spend R100+ a week on beer but somehow they can't afford to pay R60 per year.

I have devised a plan to raise the money for the school that the Department of Education should be, but is not, providing to the school. Instead of asking for a once-off payment of R60 a year, we will request R20/term; this will actually bring the annual total to R80/year (but I will steer away from pointing that out). Since my school has approximately 440 learners, that would net R8800/term that can be used for school expenses resulting in an additional R8800 per year for school improvement projects. As the parents see results, hopefully they will realize that a little money goes a long way and they may be willing to contribute more.

Since the funds come from the parents and not from the Department of Education, the parents can play a more direct role in how the money is spent. Each term the parents will vote on initiatives they would like to use the money for. Ideas I have are: a new kitchen, an improved computer lab which can also be used for educating parents, a new class room building, and new learning materials. This approach will bring a constant source of funds into the school providing money to the school to improve children's education.

One of the keys to the success of this initiative is to make sure that the funds are used for what they've been allocated for and not be stolen by corrupt officials. Very easily, people in high places could quietly increase the food and entertainment budget of the educators. I have faith in my principal that she will do the right thing and make sure everything goes in the right places.

The annual parents' meeting will be held at the end of November. At the meeting, my principal, some faculty, and I will be presenting this concept to them. If this initiative passes, Mnyamana stands the chance to become one of the richer poor schools. The parents will also be able to hold their heads high knowing that they had a direct impact on improving the education of their children and themselves. Let's hope that is something that they think is worth R20/term.

MST (Mid-Service Training)

Last week I went to MST (Mid-Service Training) which was conveniently about 50 km from my village. This is our 4th training of our service-PST, IST, LST were the first three-and the last before our COS conference next June. The first three focused on the acquisition of skills that would help us better do our jobs. This one was more about reflection: where I felt I was in regards to my projects, my mental and physical well-being and what I planned to do with the few remaining months of my service.

We did an exercise to help us reflect on how we were feeling about being here now. There were several choices: I'm doing what I came here to do; I made a commitment and I'm sticking with it; I'm ready to go home now; I am happy with where I am right now; I am really making a difference in the lives of the people I'm working with, etc. It was really tough to say I felt more with one than the other since I experience all of those mental states often more than one in a day.

Some weeks I sit in my room for several days straight leaving only when I need to use the toilet or throw out water from bathing or cooking. These times I am usually craving the convenience of home: hot shower, large kitchen, cable television, carpeted floors. This often results when I have had a close succession of failures or disappointment.

Some days I wonder why I even bother. I ask someone to do something simple that has the potential to greatly benefit them but they don't do it. I waste 2 hours waiting for people to come to a meeting that they don't show up for but then wait for the next time they see me to explain why they didn't come. An educator tells me they will have something done at a certain time but don't do it until I'm sitting there holding their hand. These days make me crave American efficiency and accountability that makes it so much easier to get things done.

Some days I resent the laziness of the people when they walk up to me and greet me or don't and then ask me for "5 bob" (R.50) to buy sweets (candy) or R2 for a drag (cigarette), or R5 to buy food (which is often requested by someone sitting in a shabeen or tavern drunk holding a beer. I of course can't give them money because then everyone else will ask me for money citing that I gave money to another person so why not them?

All too often I am seen as a walking bag of money because I'm white instead of the person who I am with the qualities I possess. I thought that being white in America made me feel like just another spoke in the wheel who was completely average. Despite many people who know who I am and what I'm here doing, those same people will still say "give me R__". It makes me miss the non-discriminatory beggars in the U.S. who have manners.

Sometimes I'll be laying in my bed or sitting outside just thinking about my day completed thinking, "Wow, I'm in South Africa". I could be in the U.S. working an 8-5 job where I'm performing the same mundane activities day in and day out but I'm not. I am living in a village, sometimes without running water and electricity, learning and experiencing a very different culture. I feel very lucky knowing that few others get this opportunity. These are the days that I really enjoy.

As I navigate the last eleven months of my service and try to "leave my mark" I keep in mind that it is a very short time that I am here. I often crave the convenience and comfort of my previous life. However, I keep in mind that in a few years, I may be sitting in an insulated building with carpets, running water, and dependable electricity, longing for all of the adventure and experience that I gained during my life of inconvenience and discomfort.

Why are you so nice to me?

I had a rather eye-opening and disturbing conversation with a girl in my village who was around 13 years old.

A paraphrased version of the conversation:

Girl: Lotjhani Jabulani (hello Jabulani (my South African name))
Me: Yebo Ninjani (Yes, how are you?)
Girl: Sharp, wena unjani ((pronounced 'shop' meaning 'good') and how are you)
Me: Sharp
Girl: Give me 2 up (give me 2 Rand)
Me:No, you give me 2 Rand

As usual, I followed that response with a series of other responses and questions meant to make her think about her request:

You give me 2 Rand today and then I will give you 2 Rand tomorrow. You don't have 2 Rand today? So what would make me believe you'll have 2 Rand tomorrow to pay me back? If you're going to have 2 Rand tomorrow, why don't you just wait until tomorrow? What have you done for me so that you would deserve me giving you 2 Rand? Why do you deserve 2 Rand more than everyone else who asks me for money? If I gave you my money, how would I feed and clothe myself and do my job?

Generally people will get frustrated by this once it has sunk in that they are not going to get money from me and walk away. Instead of just turning and walking away she continued.

Girl: You're so nice to me, why don't you hate me?
Me: Why should I hate you?
Girl: Well, because I'm black
Me: Well, I don't, it takes too much energy to hate people; especially over something so petty as the color of your skin.

I proceeded to explain to her that the color of her skin doesn't determine what she can and can't do. This is, of course, the very reason she assumed that I had money that I might be willing to give her. I think by the end of the conversation she felt more empowered to look beyond the color of her and other's skins and be more optimistic for the future.

The first post-Apartheid election occurred only 15 years ago meaning that a large portion of the current children's parents were directly impacted as young adults by the Apartheid system. Since your beliefs are largely formed in your formative years from those of the adults around you, it's no surprise that some of the kids have developed this set of beliefs. It's a sad reality that a significant portion of the population still has deeply rooted beliefs like this. The sadder thing is that these views are still cultivating in the young minds who are the future of South Africa. Since South Africa is the most democratic sub-Saharan African country and South it wants to be seen as a developed country, hopefully South Africans will make a stronger effort to try and ease racial tensions and move forward instead of being held back by deep-rooted hatred.

Volleyball Tournament: What Went Wrong

The volleyball tournament was meant to be run today (Heritage Day, a South African national holiday), tomorrow, and Saturday. My previous entry described the roller coaster of a challenge trying to put this together.

Things that were supposed to happen - what actually happened:

iKwekwezi FM was to air a radio advertisement for the tournament - the Community Development Worker from Vezubuhle didn't submit the proper paperwork so the ad never aired

The municipal government was to provide us with a team to represent them, volleyballs, and a tent for the testing - The municipality is still on strike (going on three weeks now) so the players wouldn't come and none of the paperwork was processed to get volleyballs or a tent since there was no one to process it

KwaMhlanga Hospital was to provide VCT services at the event as well as field a team - As promised, they showed up, but since no one was there, they left saying they would come back tomorrow if there were more people. Since today was National Heritage Day, the team was at another event.

A DJ was to play music and be the MC for the event - As promised, he showed up, but since there weren't enough people we requested he didn't set up but to stay on standby in case there was a large number of teams that registered at the event in the morning

Caterers were to cook and sell food to the people at the event - They also remained on standby but since no one showed up, their services were not needed

The Police Service was to provide volleyballs, trophies and medals for awards - They said it was too short notice (2 months is too short?) so they didn't get the proposal through the proper channels in time. Fortunately, they were not necessary since there weren't any brackets. What would I have done with all of those extra trophies?

Me: Happy Father's day dad, I got you a present
Dad: (he opens it) uhhh, thanks for the...women's bracket championship trophy. I guess I'll put it next to my "World's Greatest Dad" mug, use it as a paperweight. Yeah, this perfect, thanks.
Me: I knew you'd like it!

The teams were supposed to pay a R50 entry fee and I was going to use the money to buy raffle tickets - No teams showed up therefore there were no teams to pay entry fees and no money to buy raffle prizes. I didn't even have raffle tickets so maybe that worked out to my benefit.

Our revised plan (this morning) since all of those things fell through:

Today we hung out and played volleyball waiting for people to show up so we could register them. Registration would be completed today and early tomorrow morning. We would then play a tournament with those registered teams Friday and Saturday. Trophies without inscriptions would be brought as awards for the awards ceremony so people could take pictures. The trophies would then be taken back, engraved, and returned to the winners.

I spoke with everyone who was there and explained all of the challenges that I faced which resulted in the lackluster tournament. I really appreciate their showing up and participating but I asked them for a little understanding and flexibility. The compromise we reached this afternoon resulted in this revised plan:

Regardless of who shows up tomorrow, we will hold a small social tournament amongst whoever shows up. All participants will receive a certificate of participation from the Department of Sports and Recreation. The winners will be announced and will at a future date be awarded volleyballs; but no trophies will be awarded. We will hold another tournament in the near future that is marketed more effectively and more highly resourced. Winning a larger tournament will have more meaning and deserve the recognition of a trophy.

Although the running of this tournament was a complete failure in just about every way possible, it was a good learning experience. I have formulated a plan to run an excellent netball tournament in December. More details to come. . .

Project Update: Community Sports League

After several different attempts-playing and hoping people would willingly join, advertising practices, etc.-we have decided to take a different approach. On September 24-26, we will be hosting Vezubuhle Community Sports Club's 1st Annual Volleyball Tournament in conjunction with an HIV testing drive. The people who get tested will be eligible for a raffle for a variety of prizes (which I still need to acquire), champions and runners-up will receive trophies, and everyone will receive a certificate of participation.

Since volleyball can be played by people of all ages and abilities it was chosen to be the focus of the first tournament. Although it is not very popular and nothing is organized, there are still a reasonable number of people who play. This tournament will introduce people to the sport of volleyball so that newly interested players can start practicing and will hopefully compete in next year's tournament. I don't expect a massive turnout-I may be pleasantly surprised or extremely overwhelmed if the opposite happens-but the purpose is to launch the idea and start the movement of sport as a social activity.

Drug/alcohol abuse and criminal activity is a huge problem here and the tournament and league will aim to provide people with a healthy, socially acceptable activity to pull people away from those types of activities. To further this cause, the event is being held at a primary school and alcohol is prohibited. Drunk players will be disqualified, drunk spectators will be turned away, and alcohol will not be allowed on the campus. Once competition is over, the people are free to drink as they wish off of the school grounds.

The tournament will include 7 brackets intended to reach all of the target demographics: secondary school boys/girls, primary school boys/girls, men, women, and coed. The tournament was meant to be for the villages within the Kwaggafontein and KwaMhlanga area. We started running an advertisement for the event on the regional radio station iKwekweziFM, and I am not sure what the coverage area is so I may be inundated with phone calls and have to turn people away. Turning people away wouldn't be so bad because it would show that there is a widespread interest in this type of league and I can encourage the Department of Sports and Recreation to take action.

The past week has been a rollercoaster of a ride in the way of planning. Up until last Friday I was under the impression that I would be able to use the new courts for the tournament. I was thrown for a loop when I was told I needed approval from the sports advisory committee of the school. Since the courts won't be done until tomorrow (they were due to be completed mid-July), the school never formed a team and we have been unable to use the courts. They decided that it would be unfair to allow the public to use it before the learners really got to play with it; which is a fair request.

The frustrating part is that I am constantly asked to adapt and change my plans but when something goes out of my control, no one is willing to adapt to make it easier for the plans to go smoothly.

The official ruling was handed down and confirmed today that they will not grant me permission to use the courts. As to not cause further friction, I accepted their declination and requested that we be able to host a netball tournament there this Summer (December); a plan I had formulated with the principal yesterday after it became apparent I would be denied use of the facilities. They said it required further discussion and planning but no one would give me an inkling of positivity that it would be allowed, we'll see.

Fortunately I was able to swing it right around and get it back on track in one day. I went to the other primary school and got approval from the Deputy Principal to use their school for the tournament and got positive feedback from the educators saying the were excited to host the tournament. Since there is only one volleyball court we need to build some temporary ones. I went to Build-it-a building supply store that has provided volunteers in the area with supplies for other projects-to request materials for the construction of temporary courts. They have promised to provide me with 6 poles, 24 eye hooks, and a few bags of cement to create the uprights. to complete the construction of the courts, I am going to borrow nets from the schools in the area. Build-it was even so gracious to promise to provide me with chalk to mark the lines for the courts. Hopefully I will be building these courts this weekend so I will have extra people to help me.

I have spoken with the Department of Health and they are very excited about the tournament. They will be providing us with the HIV testing technicians and a mobile clinic to assist any injured or ill participants.

My counterpart has arranged to have his sister's catering company cater the event. Instead of paying them a set rate for their services-since we don't have funds to give them-they will be selling their food to the community and a portion of the profits will go to the Sports Club to support future purchases of equipment and other things. He has also secured the DJ, who we have agreed to pay after we collect the entry fees. Accepting payment after completing work is rare in South Africa since most people require upfront payment.

The municipality has been on strike for the past couple of weeks so the support I was receiving from them (which was minimal at best) almost dissolved. They will, however, be providing us with a large tent for people to sit under and stay out of the sun.

The South Africa Police Service (SAPS) has pledged trophies, medals, and award volleyballs for the winners of each bracket. They are helping under the banner of "Sports Against Crime". They will also be providing security for the event to keep out rabblerousers and drunks.

The Department of Sports will be creating an official "Certificate of Participation" to be given to every athlete. Although I personally am not a huge fan of certificates of participation, they are a huge part of the culture. Since people don't voluntarily take part in activities (especially those requiring a fee) it is necessary to recognize it. Certificates give the people something to remember the event by and proudly display on their wall as an achievement.

The first raffle donation was a car outlet powered air compressor. It was given to me because the box was destroyed and the shop owner couldn't sell it; but it still works and is worth raffling off. Shoprite-the same chain from the U.S.-has expressed interest in donating some items for it too. When we get funds from registration fees, we will be able to buy more items and are awaiting some more donations.

I have invited some area volunteers to come help run the event. I may invite some of the Peace Corps staff since they are so close to my site but I may wait until the next tournament.

This may be a spectacular success but I am sure it won't be a complete failure. We will learn how to improve it and apply it to the next tournament (netball) which will be held in December.

Results to follow . . .

The "Idea Beam"

I see my projects as large beams, "idea beams" if you will. Every idea can be represented by a beam of some size and weight (depending on the complexity of the idea).

At the beginning, the beam is laying on the ground. In order to get the idea off the ground it must be supported by a plan. A plan requires support and action to keep the idea off the ground. If either support dissolves, or action is never taken, the idea will never get off the ground.

If it is a small idea it may require only a few people to support the idea and only a few (sometimes only me) to act on it. Most of my ideas are extremely cumbersome beams. I work with the educators to gain support for the plan and everyone helps me lift that end off of the ground then set it on a strong foundation. I move to the "action" end of the beam and I find that no one follows me to help me.

What causes such a lack of action on ideas that they agree are so great? Are they disempowered? Unmotivated? Lazy? Unappreciative? Is it learned helplessness? whatever it is, it is causing me a lot of excess stress.

What they seem to be forgetting is that I am here to help them do, not do for them. They have been waiting for the Department of Education to do everything for them for years. Maybe they see me as someone hired by the DOE to come and do their work for them. Do they not realize that I am separate from the DOE and I even though I have similar goals, I am not here to do all of the work that the DOE promised they would do? It seems not.

I guess it's time to take a few steps back and re-re-establish an understanding with the educators of what is required of them. My principal said she understands what I am going through and that she too has yet to completely coax the desire and willingness to help make change out of them. She says "you're growing", I say, "We'll see".

ZOK

A major struggle in the rural schools is getting funding for school improvements. This can be attributed to many things:
1. Principals aren't qualified to be doing their jobs
2. The schools are "waiting for the Department of Education to build _______."
3. Schools want something but don't want to do anything for it

The principal of Hlonipha Secondary School-the secondary school in my village-is the opposite; he's a go-getter who works tirelessly to elp his school. When he starts a project with someone, he is persistent and doesn't stop until he gets what he wants. ZOK wanted to try partnering their business with schools that needed money and chose Hlonipha as their pilot school because it is the highest performing school in Mpumalanga Province.

ZOK is a company that converts metal shipping containers into self-contained businesses. Inside you will find computers with internet hookup, printers, copier/fax machines, public telephones, an ATM, and a tuck shop. In the tuck shop they sell a variety of groceries, snacks, and most importantly, airtime. They paint it blue, find a partner operator in the community-in this case Hlonipha Secondary-and then place it in the community giving the operator a portion of the profits.

ZOK operates similar to an MVNO (Mobile Virtual Network Operator) because the internet, public telephone, and airtime that they sell are all powered by Vodacom; Vodacom is the largest cell phone operator in South Africa (MTN and Cell C are the second and third largest). A majority of people who have cell phones buy airtime which they add to their account allowing them to make a call. Depending on day and time, call rates vary and at certain times it is free. Since people don't like spending large amount of money, they usually buy small amounts (R12 or R29). The attendant was shocked when I bought R414 of airtime yesterday.

The principal entered the contract as a fundraising method to raise money for a computer lab he wants to build that the Department of Education has been promising to build for years. He is earning the school upwards of R10,000/month which will allow his school to have enough money in about 2.5 years. After that is paid for, they will decide on a new initiative.

Sadly, not everyone in the community is celebrating his school for this achievement. One of the primary school principals refused to go to the inauguration ceremony because he felt it was unfair that Hlonipha is getting that opportunity and his school isn't. He went so far as to tell his learners' parents that they should not send their kids there out of spite; which is too bad, who wouldn't want to send their kids to the highest performing school in the province?

What he, as many other South Africans don't realize when somebody else has something that they wish they had is that there was a lot of work that was done to get it. I am happy for them, I did nothing to help them get it and I am not responsible for their school development but it gives me hope. There are decent, hard-working, professional, competent people who want to improve their country; if only there were more.

Mugged

As most of you have probably heard by now, I was recently mugged at Marabastad Bus Station in Pretoria, the capital city. Our Peace Corps Safety and Security Officer had been telling us about how dangerous the station is and since I'd been using the station for almost a year I had gotten used to the feel of it and started to relax a little.

I let my guard down and ignored my instincts. The funny thing about following your instincts is that if they are right, it confirms that it's a good idea to follow your instincts. If you follow your instincts and they're wrong, then you have bad judgement; what a crap shoot. My instincts told me that the vague instructions I received were wrong once everything started to look unfamiliar; the three guys who were "helping" guide me to where the taxis had other intentions; and the open field that I was being led towards was not a safe place to be.

Since the piece of my brain that was removed during surgery is responsible for being able to tell directions I often doubt myself when I feel lost. I place too much trust in others and not enough in my instincts thinking that this is an extreme impairment when it probably isn't as severe as I think. Since every time I go there it seems to take me a while to figure out where I need to be and often get help from people without trouble I had a naive sense that this was a good idea.

They walked me into an open field with a million exits but I was wearing a large backpack so I couldn't tell if they had a weapon pressed to my back and they were three guys about my age. I decided that given the uncertainty of a lethal weapon, the fact that I am out of shape, and three angry young men could inflict some serious physical harm on me, I chose to let them steal whatever they wanted and get on with it. They shouted at me "Don't f***ing move!", "Don't turn around!". They rifled through my pockets they asked me what was in my backpack and I said books (which was mostly true). To my surprise, they thought I was honest enough to believe and just shouted "walk away! Don't f***ing stop! Don't f***ing look!".

Tsotsis (means thieves or criminals in isiNdebele) don't really have much use for books. Hawkers don't sell them because they can't hang them on the boards they carry their merchandise on. People don't usually go to pawn shops when they're looking for used books, and people who mug people on the street wouldn't usually put reading on their list of favorite activities.

After it was over they had stolen about 100 Rand in cash and my cell phone (which I think was already stolen from somebody else and resold to me at the store) worth about 300 Rand when purchased new. At the current exchange rate that is about 50 US dollars.

I came to this country to experience a new culture and help the people improve their lives. I don't mean that I think the American way of life is the right life and my goal is to impose it upon them. But since their expressed interest is improving their standard of living through economic empowerment, I can help give them tools to improve their lives for themselves.

When I was mugged I felt that I was violated and that the people don't realize the value of what I have to offer them. I wish I could have explained to the tsotsis and they could have understood and accepted that the long-term benefits of working towards a better life far outweighs the short-term benefits of robbing me of my money and things. They also don't see the value in earning things but only, you have what I want so I am going to take it therefore I will have it. I know that this behavior comes from being uneducated and unemployed but sometimes I feel that even if given the opportunity for a job, some would rather steal than work for their money.

I realize that this experience isn't unique to me or even to South Africa; if it were then you wouldn't ever read or hear about development workers being kidnapped, imprisoned, or killed. I have to accept that I can't expect to help everyone or get them to understand and appreciate what I am trying to do. Crime will persist while I am here and long after I have left but I guess the best thing to do is be vigilant and not become a victim of it and try to help those who want my help.

Mandela Day Weekend

I went to Johannesburg the weekend before last to get my camera fixed and play ultimate frisbee. I stayed at a backpacker called Sleek (formerly called Acousticks) Friday night through Monday morning. I had planned on playing frisbee Friday and Sunday night but had no plans for Saturday (which I forgot was Mandela Day, the day Nelson Mandela was born).

After frisbee on Friday I went out and had some food and drinks with one of the guys and his grad school friends at their pub. I had gotten into contact with him because I wanted to play ultimate and he had organized pickup games in Johannesburg. He e-mailed me detailed instructions on how to get to all the places I needed to, picked me up at the camera place, brought me to frisbee on friday, dropped me off at a backpackers, then picked me up for and dropped me off from frisbee on Sunday. There is something about ultimate frisbee that creates instant camaraderie amongst those that play. It was refreshing to play again since it is one of the things I've missed a lot while being away from the U.S.

When staying at backpackers I am always able to find at least a few people I can relate to. People who stay at backpackers seem to share the same sense of camaraderie as those who play ultimate frisbee; must be because they have similar mentalities.

I met a middle-aged South African guy who upon introducing myself immediately pegged me as an American. Strangely enough, another guy named Nick, who was sleeping in the same dorm was also from NY. I woke up the next morning and the first thing I said to the guy who I presumed was Nick was "Are you from NY?". He was a little shocked but confirmed that he was.

Nick was here doing some climate research as an intern with the Red Cross. There was also a large group of people here with Global Studio whom Nick had joined forces with to do some non-related work with. Since I didn't have anything to do until Sunday he said I could join them. I had woken up at 8 am and contemplated going back to sleep since I've been a little lazy lately and sleeping until 10 on most days. I don't teach and I don't have pre-determined hours when I am supposed to be at work so it doesn't matter when I get up.

They were going to Diepsloot which is a squatter settlement just outside of Johannesburg. The settlement had a completely different feel than the village I live in. Squatter settlements are on government-owned land instead of tribal land which is controlled by a chief. Therefore it is a free-for-all so anyone can build a house anywhere. Most of the houses are shacks that are made of tin (tin shacks are the minority and brick the majority in my village). since a lot of people don't have yards they don't have water taps so more people share the same public tap. A large portion of the population is from Zimbabwe or Tanzania or other bordering countries.

Crime is much more of an issue there so we were instructed to never walk alone. I felt pretty confident and I would have been comfortable walking amongst the residents because I am so used to being the minority. Nonetheless, I heeded their warning and stayed with other people.

We helped plant some trees and left the pick axe and spades (shovels) as well as instructions for how to care for the trees. Since we had so few tools I spent a lot of time just observing or playing with the kids. Then the locals started to harass me since I wasn't doing any work suggesting I was too weak. Of course, they chose to have me "prove myself" when we had reached a large rock. After 10 minutes of chipping away at the rock they were satisfied and I was allowed to retire.

We spent the other part of the afternoon playing with the kids. They were supposed to build wire cars-cars made out of wire, screws, and shoe polish containers-but there was not enough materials or staff to instruct so we had to find a way to entertain 30 kids. We decided to introduce duck,duck, goose since that could be played with a large group fairly easily. I had forgotten the rules and it proved to be more difficult to get the kids to play "correctly".

The child that was "goosed" was, as most of you may remember, supposed to chase the other child around and try and tag them before they did a lap and sat down. The chasing child would more often than not forget to stand up and start chasing the other child. The chased child nine times out of ten forgot that they were supposed to sit down after doing a lap and kept running around the circle or realized they couldn't run fast enough in a circle so tried to lose them by running erratically away from the circle until they or the other child fell down.

Since they were having difficulty we explained the game to the older kids (around 13+ when most kids were 4-10) so that they could demonstrate it to the kids. The older kids were doing a good job engaging the kids doing the typical grown-up thing pretending to be unable to run faster than the child thus either getting caught by the child or being unable to catch them. This proved to be slightly counterproductive because the kids were enjoying chasing/being chased by the older kids so no one was picking the small children and they were just sitting there neglected and bored.

When I first got to Africa I would have probably been extremely frustrated that they didn't seem to follow my instructions. Since then, I have realized that when teaching kids (or adults) games it doesn't matter that they weren't playing by my rules. Everything seems to get Africanized once introduced here anyways. The important thing was that I was keeping the kids occupied and interacting with them.

Some people get this view that Zimbabweans and other immigrants are here to rob South Africans of their possessions or livelihood . It is true that some people who come here commit crimes, but so do South Africans. However, not ALL immigrants are criminals. I talked to quite a few non-South Africans who lived there and they took it as there home. To them, it wasn't just a squatter settlement that they were occupying. That was their home, they didn't like the crime, uncleanliness, or lack of nice areas to gather. It was refreshing and frustrating at the same time because many of them wanted to make change but they also lacked the resources and know-how to acquire those resources. An entire settlement of people falling through a gaping hole in the system.

And I almost rolled over and went back to sleep, good choice.

Reflections on my Trip to the U.S.

When I was about to go home to the U.S. I had mixed feelings. I very much wanted to see my family and I knew that they had looked forward to seeing me too. However, I was very into my work and it seemed that things were ready to take off. Regardless of how I felt before, I am definitely happy that I went home for a visit.

The two big events that I went home for were Cate and Mike's wedding and my and Cate's birthday. Given how far apart Cate and I have lived from one another since 2001, we seem to spend quite a few of our birthdays together. We went to Niagara Falls, walked the Cave of the Winds (I have some awesome sandals to remember it by) and rode the Maid of the Mist. It was a nice fairly relaxing birthday that I got to spend with part of my new family and more importantly my twin.

I'd like to give a shout out to Cate and Mike Dillon for an awesome wedding! I was standing at the back of the alter, watching Cate walk down the aisle and I became a little verklempt and felt a little teary-eyed. It was then that I realized that my twin sister was really a grown woman. My twin sister, whom I shared the womb with, lived with for the first 18 years of my life, and seem to share some sort of a "twin-sense" with was getting married! Other than when I get married (maybe) or when one of my children (maybe) get married, this is probably the most significant and meaningful weddings I'll ever attend. Your wedding was really nice too, Jill, but you're my older sister so it's not quite as big a jolt as when your twin ties the knot.

Between the rehearsal dinner, reception, after party, after after party, and the painful next day I think I got to talk to most of the people at the wedding. I really enjoyed seeing everyone; most of whom I hadn't seen for over a year. Before I left and while I was away I never really thought about how much I valued my friends and family. I value that when friends and family see me they see David and then they think about who I was the last time they saw me and then they talk to me; I come before all other parts of my identity. This was very refreshing because in South Africa I am first seen as white, then male, then presumed Afrikaaner (to Black South Africans) therefore, I must have money. Even some people who have seen me everyday in my village still look at me and don't yet see David, they just see Rs (South African currency is the Rand).

Throughout my time in the U.S. I noticed a lot of differences in my self. A huge difference is that I feel a lot more independent. For the first time, I felt like I was there as David Culeton, not David, Don and Deb Culeton's son. I became a lot more confident in my ability to talk to other people; I was very excited to share with others about the things that I was doing but then I realized I wouldn't learn anything. If you wander around a party just talking about yourself, you don't gain any new information. You just either gain other people's approval or indifference; neither is all that helpful.

I am more comfortable with myself and have realized that I spent a lot of time being worried about insignificant things; for example, dancing. I broke out of my shell during December break when I came to a seemingly obvious realization about dancing, it doesn't really matter what people you don't know think of you and at very least, your friends and family will be amused.

To my disappointment I noticed that I had let my ego grow a little too large. I know the work that I'm doing is good but I forgot that in the jar of life, friends and family are rocks but your work and the things that you do are only pebbles.

A Whole New Level of Desperation

You hear about the high murder, burglary, assault, and rape rates in South Africa and would like to believe it is not true. Since I've been here many volunteers have been victims of burglary, assault, robbery at knifepoint and attempted murder. Thankfully I have not had to deal with this.

An Afrikaans man who I've been working with has said he believes that there are no criminals in South Africa, only poverty-striken people who resort to crime. I can comprehend people who rob and steal as a desperate act to support themself. But if rape and murder are also committed it is absolutely unexcusable.

I went to talk to a woman who recently opened an old age home to see how things were going. I saw a few familiar faces however she told me about her newest resident. She was found in her house on the floor, arms and legs bound, with bruises on her head and neck. A 25 year-old "man" broke into her house, raped her, left her on the floor alone, and stole her pension check. I would like to believe this was something that was made up but I saw the woman and I could see that it was not.

I am not sure who is to blame for this act. It is very commonplace in U.S. courts to hear a defendant claim that they were abused as a child or made fun of too much at school. This person was quite possibly raised by uneducated parents, or in a one or no-parent home because his parents were victims were killed by AIDS. His school was probably under resourced and may have had poorly-trained and demotivated educators. He may have been raised by a gang and surrounded by crime his whole life.

History shows that people of all races and ethnicities can be brainwashed into believing and doing incredible and indespicable things. Nazi Germany, Islamic Jihadists, the KKK, and Japanese Kamikazees all come to mind. It's not because he's black, or because he's African and because all Africans are barbarians (not something that I believe). History also shows that when ignored and neglected by their government people will do some crazy things (any oppressive regime depriving its people of their basic rights).

One thing is for sure is that there is a large portion of the population that is being left behind by their government. I refrain from saying forgotten because they know they are there they just ignore them so they can better serve themselves. The current administration endorses vigilante justice as a compliment to the ineffective (in many areas) South African Police Service.

These problems are so deep-rooted into this society that it is hard to fathom widespread change happening anytime soon. All I can hope is that in my time here I may influence a few children to stay on track and study hard, a few young adults to find jobs or get more training and skills, and motivate community members to make change happen themselves. In this way, change will perpetuate and eventually the changes that I was hoping to make while I was here will be fully realized.

House For Sale?

I was walking over to the hardware store with my friend the other day and commenting on how some of the houses were really nice. They were mostly made of brick (some of corrugated tin) and many of those were plastered over and painted brightly. A vast majority of the houses have at least some grass which is not what I expected when I was coming here.

I also noticed that I didn't see ANY "house for sale" signs. During Pre-Service Training another trainee said something about Americans being a more transient society where we may move several times throughout our lives (I've lived for longer than 3 months in 5 different places). Rural South Africans are not transient. The men may leave for 3 months to a year to work in a mine, thus seeing his children and wife 1-4 times a year, but the family would never move.

The father bears ownership of the house. Once the father dies, his wife gains ownership. If she is no longer alive, the YOUNGEST son gains ownership of the house. If there is no son then the daughters own it. If there are no surviving children then anybody from the family can move in. People do not sell their houses.

A majority of houses and low-rise apartment buildings built in the U.S. have light wood-framed construction with vinyl siding, wooden shingles, or a brick facade. Since the wood used for framing the house cannot be exposed to weather through more than one freeze-thaw cycle without losing a lot of structural integrity it must be built quickly.

Since few people have the money to pay for a house in one payment, most people take out a mortgage and pay for it in 20 or 30 years. The advantages to this are you get to move in right away, your payments may be less than renting, and you will eventually own the house.

All houses that I've seen in rural South Africa are a combination of: brick or corrugated tin walls, corrugated tin or clay tile roofs, and dirt or concrete floors. Houses with brick walls rarely have dirt floors and the exterior walls are either bare brick or plastered and painted. Houses with corrugated tin walls never have clay tile roofs and sometimes have concrete floors. In some areas of Africa at higher elevations it does snow so some people live in rondavels. Rondavels are cylindrical brick buildings with conical grass thatched roofs which are far warmer.

Since the structural materials are all water proof (the window frames are even made of steel) and there is no freeze-thaw cycle in my area, they can be built over several years; which is in fact how it is done. The advantages to this are that there isn't a monthly payment and when it is built it is completely paid for.

Since employment is often hard to come by and income is not always steady people can't afford to pay a monthly mortgage and many would default on their loans. As people get money they build a new part of their house. Some houses have just a foundation, half-built walls, window frames with no glass, or finished walls with no roof.

My closest friend's house has all of the brick walls built with a tile roof and is almost finished with the ceiling. He still needs to finish the ceiling, install the rest of the glass on the windows, and install burglar bars in the windows and on the porch. Eventually he will get running water which can only be achieved by having a jojo which is like a mini water tower that is filled by a tap.

He started making the bricks out of cement and sand that he is going to use to build a fence around his house yesterday. Every house has a fence around it; it could be a tin shack with with a fence made from wooden sticks and metal poles held up by barbed wire, there will be a fence.

He plans to have finished all of this by September of next year; he started 6 years ago. After that is finished he will knock down the tin shack behind the house that contains the kitchen and living room and his mother and sister and her two kids' bedroom and build a new building in its place.

At the end of those two years, he will own a house that is completely paid for. And some day, his wife, son, daughter or family member will own it.

Coming Home to the U.S. for Vacation (at a Breaking Point)

I have been counting down the days until I come to the U.S. for my sister Cate's wedding on June 13th for about 4 months. About 3 weeks ago I was excited to go but frustrated because I felt I would be leaving right in the thick of things which might cause problems with my projects' progress. Two weeks ago I was overstressed and hospitalized and my trip to the U.S. turned from a frustration to a goal.

Since I came here and started to work on projects my sense of urgency has transformed. After talking with the people and observing the site I determined what we both saw as problemed areas I could help with and found some people who agreed with me and wanted to help change these things. After establishing that, I (very naively) thought that we would quickly come up with a plan, get funding, and implement the plan, and then things would work perfectly. Nothing has gone "according to plan" but I guess a lot of life is that way.

Initially I was distraught about leaving for vacation since I felt that my projects would come to a screeching halt without. But then I realized that if I had never come then these projects would never have been started in the first place. The schools and community spent a long time without these changes and they can wait a little longer for them; I am alright with that.

Sports Field Project Update

This has been the most stressful of all of my projects however I think it has the greatest potential for enhancing the children's education. My APCD suggested that I drop the schools whose principals have been less than helpful in the project thus far. I really want to drop 3 of them however there are 4 reasons that I wont:

1. This isn't about improving the principal's school but increasing the educational opportunities of the children
2. If I don't do it now it will be extremely difficult and unlikely that it will ever happen.
3. There is a jealousy mentality that if someone else has something that you don't you should vandalize and destroy it. I would rather build fields on all 6 schools and have them remain undamaged than build them on only 3 and then have them be destroyed.
4. This project is part of a larger plan that cannot come to fruition fully unless this part is complete.

When doing a large development project it is usually well planned with a tight schedule with specific goals that must be met on or before a specific date. Since I started the project in a foreign country with no guidance or precedent, the process has been convoluted with a lot of struggles and setbacks.

I recruited 9 students to help me with this because I thought this would be a good learning experience for them and I could teach them a lot about engineering and running projects. This has turned out to be much more of a learning experience for me and much less of a teaching one.

I spent way too much time trying to get "official" site plans for the schools. After months of going through these channel I extrapolated site plans from a property plan of my village that I had for months. Then I measured the size and location of the existing buildings using a 100 meter measuring tape with the assistance of the students. I drafted the site plans and the existing structures on Microsoft Visio. I used these drawings along with field templates to consult the educators in the design of the fields.

As of Tuesday I had consulted with a professional engineer who has 20+ years of sports field construction experience and had started designing the field placement. I had planned on leaving the project at that point and completing the design and proposal upon returning since today I am leaving South Africa.

The South African LOTTO provides a lot of funding for sports programs, new sports field construction and upgrading of old sports field facilities. My key school, Mnyamana Primary School, received some funding last year so I intended to finish the proposal with a final design and then just tell them to go ahead and build the fields. Tuesday morning I received a call from the field consultant saying that Mnyamana and the LOTTO both called them and said they wanted him to start building the fields and he needed the location where I wanted the field built. Wednesday I rushed out and came up with a design and staked out where I wanted the combination field to be built. They claim that they want to build it immediately so we'll see if it gets built by the time I get back; it would be awesome but TIA so it's highly unlikely.

Initially I wanted to have the project completely done having all fields built by next year; approximately 4 per school with 6 schools. I envisioned each school having beautiful grass soccer fields, cinder running tracks, baseball diamonds, basketball, volleyball, and tennis courts like the ones we had in high school. This is exactly why you don't do projects unilaterally. My imaginary world had several problems:

1. Grass fields are expensive and difficult to maintain (fertilize twice a year, water everyday, cut three times a week) and they would be destroyed withing a few months since none of the schools have the resources or training to maintain them
2. The sites were far too small to have all of those fields built on them
3. Some sports are extremely expensive due to the amount of equipment required

The project scope has now been revised:
1. Each school will get a running track (some will be smaller than 400m so that they fit) with a soccer field inside
2. Each primary school will get 2 combination volleyball, netball, tennis courts
3. Each secondary school will get combination volleyball, basketball tennis courts
4. Courts will be made of concrete and fields of clay to minimize maintenance costs
5. Each school will have a concrete palisade fence constructed around its campus.
6. Berms or "seating hills" will be built next to the fields instead of building bleachers since they will be less expensive to construct and require less maintenance
7. I will help them design the placement of the fields and structures taking into account future construction plans (libraries, computer labs, etc.)
8. They will design and build the brai stands and pavilions for their own schools.

I have also changed the construction schedule. I initially wanted to have them all built by the time I leave in September 2010 by building a new field constructed every three months. This pace would not allow the schools to fully utilize the fields and would also be extremely stressful for me. I have decided that the community should take more responsibility for the project. I will help them complete the design and acquire funding but fields will be built on 6-month intervals.

Once the development forum has been established they will take over the management of the project and oversee the completion of the project which will occur in 2011 or 2012 depending on when we can get started. The fields will not be done by the time I leave but I am fine with that because constructing the fields is not the only goal of the project. I also want to build the people's capacity to do such projects on their own.

New Project: Community Development Forum

A big part of Peace Corps is to work towards sustainable change. I had recently met with my APCD (Assistant Peace Corps Country Director) and he suggested that my projects were too large and that I needed to make sure that if I had to leave unexpectedly they wouldn't collapse.

My community counterpart, Jerry, approached me a few weeks back with the idea of forming a Community Development Forum. The Forum would be in charge of identifying community issues, formulating a plan to address them, and implementing the solution. I was astounded by the brilliance of the idea.

The Forum will consist of representatives from all major stakeholders in the community: Mukhanyo Community Development Center, a development organization that does a large amount of HIV/AIDS and OVC work; the 6 schools in the village; South African Police Service (SAPS); Ward Council; Community Development Worker, the municipality's employee in charge of community development initiatives; Tribal Council, the traditional chief's council. Each stakeholder will be responsible for choosing their representatives however they choose. Every person in the community should be represented by at least one of those representatives.

Being represented in development plans and taking initiatives to address their own development needs are two foreign concepts to the people of my village. Initially, people will be skeptical and since they haven't seen the government doing the things that they promised, may have been burned by the government before, and insist on waiting for change to come. The goals of the Forum are to unite the people to work towards a cause they believe in and make change come to them.

The CDW and Jerry are very dedicated to this cause and are working on gaining the support of the other stakeholders. The beauty of this project is that the idea was generated by Jerry, he and the CDW are taking the initiative to form it, and I only have an advisory role in it.

Once the Forum members have been selected I would like to form a Non-Profit Organization(NPO) whose main goal is to serve the communities interests whether it be infrastructure development, educational seminars, or cultural events. As an NPO, the Forum will be able to lobby for change for the community and apply for government grants and funding from private companies and organizations. The International Development Co-operative(IDC) in the South Africa Treasury operates the Development Co-operative Information System(DCIS) in order to distribute the Official Development Assistance(ODA) funds. In order to be eligible for ODA funds from the IDC listed in the DCIS our NPO must be tied to the South African government; our CDW represents the municipality therefore satisfying that requirement. South Africa really likes their acronyms.

After the Forum has been established I plan to engage it on any unfinished projects that I'm still working on. I would like to transfer the management of all of the projects over to the Forum and have all new initiatives to come from it. This will give me(and my APCD) a sense of security in knowing that my projects have a reasonable chance of being completed even if I do need to leave.

Is Jabulani Dead?

My supervisor has had three volunteers who previously did work at her school all of who early-terminated (ET'd) meaning they chose to end their service short of their contractual obligation.

The first two were involved in the famous Drakensberg Mountains incident which is told at every Pre-Service Training (PST)as a warning to incoming volunteers. The first three months of our service was meant to be "community integration" where we get to know our communities and all volunteers are on "lockdown"; meaning we are not supposed to leave our sites for any reason other than medical or shopping. The two volunteers were a married couple who chose to break this rule by leaving five days early for a hike through the Drakensberg Mountains in KwaZulu-Natal, another province in South Africa (my village is in Mpumalanga Province). In the middle of the night tsotsis (South African criminals/thiefs) robbed them of everything except for the clothes they had on and the things in their pockets; this included their cell phones and some pocket change.

They panicked and decided to phone the U.S. Embassy who very promptly picked them up in a helicopter and brought them back to the embassy in Pretoria. This kind of activity is frowned upon by the Peace Corps so they were given the choice to either be Administratively Separated or resign from their service. Administrative Separation from the Peace Corps is like being fired and all but nullifies anything good you've done during your service. The couple wisely chose to resign and within 24 hours they were returned to their site, packed their things, and were whisked away to the airport.

Their 2nd attempt at hosting a volunteer was a 24 year-old journalist whose career was also tragically cut short. A few months after arriving at site his father passed on so he chose to ET to go home to support his family.

As the expression goes, the third time is a charm. Now my supervisor has a 26 year-old civil/architectural engineer who is on the verge of getting a badly needed renovation done and building some well-deserved sports fields amongst other things. Given her history with Peace Corps Volunteers leaving early she is extremely protective of me.

The recent health emergency occurred at the other school with the principal who has a reputation for not handling situations such as this too well. My supervisor told me that she received a call from him in a massive panic. The conversation between my supervisor (Ester) and the other principal (Paul) went something like this:

Ester: Hello (answering phone)
Paul: Jabulani (my African name they gave me which means "we are all happy")is gone!
Ester: What?
Paul: Jabulani was here and then he couldn't walk or talk and then a white man, He took Jabulani!
Ester: What?
Paul: A white man took Jabulani!
Ester: What white man?
Paul: I don't know!
Ester: What do you mean you don't know?
Paul: He was meeting with this white man and then he took him away!

Ester rushed over to the other school to find Paul in a panic, educators crying, and a general state of chaos. Knowing Paul and playing this whole series of events out in my head it seems extremely comical but I realize the severity of the situation. I now know that in case of an emergency I should not contact Paul.

They were going to come visit me in the hospital but they were told I was going to be discharged so they shouldn't bother. Two days later I was released from the hospital and they finally got a call from me saying I was fine. When I returned to site I visited my schools to let them all know I was OK and was ready to work.

Some volunteers have very unsupportive educators and supervisors at their schools. Many feel that they are there as a trophy allowing the schools to say "Look at us, we have a volunteer". It is very comforting to know that mine are so concerned about me and makes it seem all that much more worth it to be here doing this work.

In Hospital

Last Thursday I was rudely awaken at 6:45 (had intended to sleep til 10) by a phone call from Tokkie, a sports field consultant from Pretoria who wanted to meet with me. The meeting was scheduled for 9:00 on Friday but he moved it up since he was going to be in the area so he would only have to make one trip to the area. I showed up to the meeting and was walking into the building but started to feel dizzy and staggering back and forth kind of like I was drunk. I told Tokkie and we sat down to start the meeting.

As I was starting my computer and pulling out my papers I started to lose motor function and would miss when trying to complete the simple task of reaching for a book. As I was trying to talk my jaw started to go limp so that I couldn't even form sentences. I called the Peace Corps Medical Officer (PCMO) and she said to sit still and relax. I started to go get much worse and could barely even move my mouth to make words. We called the PCMO back and I forced a few words out that probably made only a little bit of sense and she told us to go to the hospital in Pretoria.

They had to almost carry me to the truck because I had such little control of my body and was almost in a state of paralysis. The part that made it most scary was that my cognitive abilities were unaffected but I couldn't move my body to talk or move so I spent the entire thinking about the possibility of being paralyzed for the rest of my life. About an hour into the trip (Pretoria is 1.5 hours away) I started to be able to talk and move again but I was incredibly dizzy so I couldn't really sit up.

We pulled up to the entrance and they came rushing to the truck and I asked for a gurney because I was so terribly dizzy when I sat upright. Instead they brought a wheel chair; later I foun out they didn't know that a gurney was a metal stretcher on wheels. Since they speak British-English and not American-English the term is "trolley" so they didn't know.

The first care that I received was almost immediate where they inserted an IV into my arm with some basic drip but I can't remember what it was. Then it wasn't really helping me so they said they were changing the drip to something called "Jet Fuel". It was brownish, left a metallic taste in my mouth and it gave me quite a boost so it lived up to its name. After that initial care they put me into a wheelchair and left me there for quite a while since they needed my bed. I hadn't had anything to eat all day since I rushed out and didn't have time for breakfast so they gave me a sandwich menu from which I ordered a ham, tomato and cheese sandwich. I sat there for quite a while and slowly ate it and seemed that I was keeping it down fairly well.

They scheduled me to have a MRI (Magnetic Resonance Imaging) scan done on my head shortly after. When scanning your head they put you in a large tube and make lots of head-pounding noise and it creates a computer image of your brain activity. Just before putting me in the technician instructed me to push an exit button if I felt nauseous and the bed would come flying out and she would burst in with a bucket. Fortunately, just before going in I vomitted up the only thing that I had eaten all day; the grilled sandwich. Problem solved.

Shortly after I was brought in for an electroencephalogram (EEG)which measures brain activity when at rest. I've been having these done all my life and I usually would have to stay up late the night before so I'd sleep through the test without problems. I used to look forward to those tests because that meant my mom would take me to a late movie on a weeknight which was a huge privilege. The last movie I saw was "Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure" which I remember being totally tubular. You also weren't supposed to eat anything the morning of (I took care of that as previously noted). The technician was pleasantly surprised when I fell right to sleep without any sedation.

EEG technology has improved which was a nice surprise. They still use the electrodes which they attach to all parts of your skull but they've improved the worst part of it; the glue. They used to use this glue that was pink and stuck to your head like superglue and took about a week to fully remove. Now they have this really nifty gel that not only is easily removed without residue it causes a really neat cooling sensation when applied.

Immediately afterwards they brought me to the ICU hooked up to 6 different electrodes for monitoring plus made me wear one of those irritating thumb pulse things. The brought my dinner which in my experience in the U.S. usually involved some type of potato or pasty food, corn, and jello. They brought me glazed chicken and vegetables over a bed of rice with a cream of vegetable soup on the side and a kettle of tea; I was shocked but delighted.

The guy who was in the bed next to me had a neck brace and feeding/breathing tube installed. The whole time I was eating and trying to sleep it sounded like he was coughing up a lung and watever mucus that was in it. The night crew came in so there was a change of nurses. I must admit, my primary nurse was rather cute however she was not a very good nurse. She spent most of her time either away or flirting with me and telling me how much she hated being a nurse and wanted to do something else so it wasn't very comforting. Hopefully she never decides to become a surgeon then tell her patients just before the operation how much she hates it.

One of the monitors I was hooked up to would occasionally start beeping really loud and not stop for about 5 minutes and the nurses would either wait outside or not even come over. If there wasn't anything wrong with me and the nurse didn't need to come check, was it really necessary to have the buzzer, probably not. By the time it was getting late I was feeling much better so I was able to take a shower using surgical scrub so that may have been the cleanest I'd ever been.

The next morning I woke up and I was as dizzy as I was the day before and couldn't sit up without getting extremely dizzy and having to lie back down. I couldn't move my head from side to side without so the phsyiologist said I'd probably be able to try standing by the next day which was absurd since I was up taking a shower the night before (my primary doctor confirmed my diagnosis of the physiologist's diagnosis later). I was starving and anticipating a wonderful breakfast to which was fairly disappointed. The milk that came with the cereal was heated and the egg dish that they brought me was covered with liver in brown sauce. I was able to eat the toast with jam and cereal with warm milk and side of fruit so I was satisfied.

The doctor came in to discuss the results of the EEG and MRI. Fortunately both scans were fine but he was surprised to see that there extra connections between the side and top of my brain; I'm forming new synapses and will become superintelligent, awesome. Not as awesomely he told me they needed to run some more tests and also arranged an appointment with the ear, nose and throat (ENT) doctor, scheduled an X-ray and later I'd be moved to a private room.

I met with the ENT and ran a whole bunch of tests that seemed more like an alien abduction autopsy and diagnosed me with an inner-ear infection that was probably caused by stress. The viruses that cause these infections are apparently always in your blood and are prone to surface when your immune system is down which in this case happened because I was stressed out (see my previous posts and you'll understand why). Then I was returned to the ICU, sigh.

They came back for me a little later at around 2:00 and said they were going to do some x-rays of my neck to make sure I didn't have a stroke. The doctor used a sonograph machine and scanned all the major arteries which was probably the longest 20 minutes of my life. she occasionally said something like "Oh", or "interesting"; both ambiguous statements can mean anything from being oddly shaped, to having discovered a clot or major heart condition. Turns out I do have one valve that is slightly malfunctioning that will cause problems in distant future (maybe in my late 60s or 70s). No clots or anything so it was good. Unfortunately they once again returned me to ICU.

At 4:30 they finally came to move me to a regular "private" room for regular monitoring and care. The room was actually with two older men. Since I had been rushed away from site and didn't have a chance to collect my things I didn't have any money on me. In order to hear the sound on the TV I had to pay R12 to the hospital which was impossible. After trying to convince the staff to give me a pair for free due to the extenuating circumstances and their complete resistance one of the visitors of the patient next to me offered to buy me a set since he felt it was torturous to be there with no entertainment.

5:30 I'm getting hungry and I ask when dinner is being served the response was 6:00. At 6:15 the response was 7:00. At 7:15 they said 7:45. One of the other men who had spent most of his time wandering around with his IV stand came over to me and offered me some of his biltong. Biltong is like beef jerky only it is made from meat from kudu or other deer-like animals instead of cow meat. By 8:30 I still hadn't received my food. I asked one final time and the nurse said, "Oh, dinner was served at 3:00 so you missed it". I said "I missed it? Ok, you need to bring me my food not just now, not now, but now now! I have been going through testing all day long and hadn't had anything since breakfast." They found my food which was cold since it had been sitting in the kitchen so they had to reheat it.

9:00 I would have thought was time for my medicine so I asked when I was going to receive it. A similar series of events transpired where I was told "now", "just now", and "The medicine is being distributed to the other patients and she will be getting to you soon". A couple times I got up to go to the desk to talk to them. At 11:30 they came to my bed and told me they had lost my prescription and could not give me my medicine and had to call the doctor. The doctor finally arrived at 1:30 and apologized profusely and said I "did the right thing waiting up" and he gave me my medicine also offering me sleeping pills. Surprisingly it was louder down there than in ICU because the man next to me was snoring like a bear.

I had spent most of the day watching Boomerang which is a channel that plays all of the old Hanna-Barbera and Warner Brothers cartoons like Tom and Jerry, Merry Melodies, the Flintstones and Johnny Bravo. Interesting fact for all of those Family Guy fans: Mayor Adam West of Quahog is based on the actor Adam West who starred as the real-life character Batman in a 1966 verison of the series. A large portion of the rest of his career was typecast and often focused on making fun of himself. Mayor Adam West and all of his idiosyncracies were develop through various appearances in cartoons including "Johnny Bravo" as Adam West, superhero. One of my favorite shows is "Time Squad" so despite being exhausted I forced myself to stay up and finally went to sleep at 3:00.

After waking up and another 3 hours of watching cartoons I was finally told I was going to be discharged from the hospital. I filled out a comment card explaining that my doctors were nice however there is a complete lack of communication citing the dinner and medicine debacles as clear examples. I was given my file and told to bring it to checkout. I reviewed it and I noticed that his initial thought was that I had a stroke; I am so happy that he witheld that opinion from me otherwise it probably would have caused me to have one anyway.

When I finally walked out of the hospital with a bag full of antibiotics with my driver who was from the embassy I felt like I was being released from prison and was free again. This is Africa.

I've Wasted an Hour and a Half!

I called a meeting on this past Monday at 9:00 AM at Mavula Primary School which is one of the schools involved in the project. I wrote a memo that stated that there was a meeting at the above-mentioned time and place and the things we would be discussing and that either the principal or a representative from the school would be required to attend. I went to each school, gave the principal the memo, sat down and explained it to them, and they agreed to either come or send a representative in their place.

On Monday at 8:30 I sent a reminder text message to the principals about the meeting. My principal didn't show up, two schools hurriedly sent representatives, two principals showed up (one of which was the principal of the school hosting the meeting), and one school didn't send a representative at all. At the end of the meeting we decided to meet again on Friday to finish up the proposal.

I went to visit the school that didn't send a representative after the meeting. I talked to the sports director and he said the principal didn't inform him of the meeting. I went in on Tuesday to talk to her and I was walking into her office and as I was walking in, and like a child who knew she was caught doing something wrong she said, "you're going to scold me, aren't you?". She claims, "It slipped my mind". I reminded her of the memo that we discussed together and that I sent her a reminder message a half hour before the meeting. She claimed her battery was flat and didn't get my message until after the meeting. I asked her why she didn't call me when she got the message, she didn't have an answer. So she knew that she messed up because the sports director told her I was there the day before looking for her and I was mad. Instead of calling me then and apologizing and acknowledging she was wrong, she waited for me to come and see her. I explained to her how much work I was doing, and that all I had asked of her was to write one letter, and come to three meetings since November and she came an hour late to the first meeting, missed the second two, and took 4 months to write the note. I told her that she doesn't seem like a person who is serious about it and must not really want it because she is putting no effort into it even though I'm asking very little of her. She said, "I want it, you can tell I am the type of person that wants it by the tone in my voice". After about another 15 minutes of this charade she appointed the sports director to come in her place.

I was running a little late today and showed up at 9:24 for the meeting and NOBODY WAS THERE! I've learned some things about communicating with people so instead of sending them a text message berating them for not showing up for the meeting at 9:00 I sent them a pleasant reminder: "Principals' meeting starts at 10:00 at Mavula. You or a representative of your school must attend". One principal came immediately; she was the only non-hosting principal that showed up. We waited for an hour and a half and then she said, "This is ridiculous, I've wasted an hour and a half waiting for this meeting to start that I could have spent doing work at my school!". I said, "See? This is what it feels like, this happens to me all of the time". I think I may have actually reached her with that message and hopefully now at least she will start coming to my meetings on time.

I visited each of the schools that didn't attend, all of which didn't send me a message saying they weren't going to make it, and had a discussion with them. I explained to them that the DOE asked them if they wanted a Peace Corps Volunteer at their school and they said no. My principal told the principals of the other 5 schools that she was applying for a volunteer and needed another school to apply with her; nobody wanted one and she had to pretty much force my other principal to sign the form. Even though my principal did all the work to get me here and keep me here, I am still helping them get sports fields and all I'm asking for is them to come or send a representative to some meetings, write a few letters, and give me their input and they can't even do that. When the Circuit Manager calls a meeting they make sure to go to his meetings or at least communicate that they weren't coming. I asked them why they felt it was ok to not go to my meetings, not send someone in their place and not call me to tell me they weren't coming. They just looked at me with a black stare with no answer except that they were sorry and from now on they are going to put more effort into it and work with me; we'll see.

I've been struggling to cope with the lack of effort that the principals have been putting into this project thus far. I have presented them with a huge opportunity to improve their schools by giving their students access to all sorts of sports and they aren't willing to put in hardly any effort to help me. I believe that I may have at least convinced that one principal to have a little more respect for me and my requests for assistance so I guess today's meeting was at least marginally successful. I would love to drop the other half of them from the project but my goal is to bring sports to the community and if I have to deal with incompetence and laziness in the school leadership then that's the way it's going to be.